Female or Male for my lifestyle

[Melissa08]

I am super excited for our first Doberman puppy. I’d like to choose the best gender for our lifestyle. Details below:

I’m a mother of 4 kids (ages 2-4-11-15)

Currently have a male chihuahua that is 4 years old (he’s pretty submissive)

Looking for the best gender to be gentle to our kids

Someone recently tried breaking into our home. My chihuahua was shaking in fear under comforters and didn’t even alert me to bark someone was coming into our home.

I am wanting the best gender who is alert of our home and strangers who enter. Since this occurred I constantly live in fear of this happening again. So a gender that would make a good service dog to help ease my PTSD and anxiety. Would also be immensely helpful as well. I’m so torn between a male or female.

I understand training also plays an important factor into this as well. Just trying to get some general gender feedback. Thank you!

 

[Gpcoguy]

Not to minimize your feelings but if thats the only reason you're considering getting a dog maybe a shotgun would be a better choice

 

[Ravenbird]

Welcome to Doberman Chat.

Have you chosen a breeder already for your future puppy? A good breeder will help you with these decisions, but most of all you will need a balanced dog - especially as a puppy - to not rough-house with your youngest kids. I don't think gender is so much a problem as the temperament in general. At the same time, some Dobermans will have such good temperaments they are not as sharp to alert at strangers. Dobermans who are overly protective of their homes and families are great but the first year or so of raising them is more challenging and requires lots and lots of training.

 

[Melissa08]

Not to minimize your feelings but if thats the only reason you're considering getting a dog maybe a shotgun would be a better choice

I definitely have several guns around my house. More than just a shotgun for sure. That’s how I was able to get this person out of my window (;

Not the ONLY reason I want a dog. My chihuahua needs a partner to play with. My Yorker recently passed away. I left all this out because I felt her passing was irrelevant to what gender may be best for my family. Thank you for your feedback.

 

[Melissa08]

Welcome to Doberman Chat.

Have you chosen a breeder already for your future puppy? A good breeder will help you with these decisions, but most of all you will need a balanced dog - especially as a puppy - to not rough-house with your youngest kids. I don't think gender is so much a problem as the temperament in general. At the same time, some Dobermans will have such good temperaments they are not as sharp to alert at strangers. Dobermans who are overly protective of their homes and families are great but the first year or so of raising them is more challenging and requires lots and lots of training.

Sorry I’m new here and not sure how to edit my reaction to your comment.

I’ve narrowed down the breeders I am interested in. Thank you I’ll be sure to discuss this with the few breeders I’ve narrowed my search down to. I’ve also read about the training. I hope I can handle it. It’s been a while since I’ve had larger dogs. My last 2 large breeds were boxers who have passed but they weren’t very aware either. I believe they wouldn’t of barked to alert me. Thank you for your feedback

 

[Ravenbird]

Thank you I’ll be sure to discuss this with the few breeders I’ve narrowed my search down to. I’ve also read about the training. I hope I can handle it. It’s been a while since I’ve had larger dogs.

Good for you - doing searches and getting different input from different breeders will give you lots of education. It won't be the size of the puppy that requires the training... these dogs are extremely intelligent and will shape themselves quickly without your guidance. Start reading through the Training & Behavior threads to get an idea of problems we see over & over again with Doberman puppies. There are several stories involving young children and many of them are success stories. We can all learn from others mistakes and successes!

 

[Ddski5]

I have both a 5 yr male and a 2 yr female- I would suggest a female. Just more laid back, not as bullheaded and definitely more eager to please- but tbh, that can really be either way depending on the genetics, litter and breeder.

Quick question:
Do you know what you are getting yourself and your family into with getting a Doberman?

 

[JanS]

Welcome from Minnesota!

Since your Chihuahua is a male, I would recommend a female since same sex aggression can be a problem.

definitely have several guns around my house. More than just a shotgun for sure.

I always call our Dobermans our alert system and we can back them up with guns.

My last 2 large breeds were boxers

We had a Boxer before and they're very similar but a Doberman is more sensitive when it comes to training.

 

[Melissa08]

I have both a 5 yr male and a 2 yr female- I would suggest a female. Just more laid back, not as bullheaded and definitely more eager to please- but tbh, that can really be either way depending on the genetics, litter and breeder.

Quick question:
Do you know what you are getting yourself and your family into with getting a Doberman?

I’ve been leaning more towards a female. Most likely what I what end up getting. Pretty excited. Thank you!

To answer your question, this is my first Doberman. I’ve watched several videos and read up on them online. We have had had 2 boxers and a yorkie. So this will be our first Doberman. Do you feel a Boxer may be best? Im debating on going back to a boxer or Doberman. Thank you!

 

[Kaiser2016]

My chihuahua was shaking in fear

Oh wow, I would have expected him to be more vicious. Never met a chi that wasn't growling and/or baring teeth lol.

maybe a shotgun would be a better choice

Do you know what you are getting yourself and your family into with getting a Doberman?

This is a great point to consider! They definitely require training and patience as they are very smart and stubborn! They are a great visual deterrent but it does take maturity before they are ready to assert themselves. For that reason, I would suggest a female because they seem to be more serious and mature much faster than males.

 

[Melissa08]

Welcome from Minnesota!

Since your Chihuahua is a male, I would recommend a female since same sex aggression can be a problem.

I always call our Dobermans our alert system and we can back them up with guns.

We had a Boxer before and they're very similar but a Doberman is more sensitive when it comes to training.

Hello! Thank you so much for the warm welcome

I’ve considered going back to a boxer again. But I feel like we need a change. I definitely miss my boxers. They’re so goofy and fun. But also seems like Dobermans have a good personality as well.

Yes! This is exactly what I would want. An alert system and my guns as a back up. Nowadays it’s important to stay strapped. Of course since the break in I’ve also update our home to be even more prepared should this ever (god forbid) happen again. Such as alarm systems, lighting, more cameras around the home.. etc

 

[Melissa08]

Oh wow, I would have expected him to be more vicious. Never met a chi that wasn't growling and/or baring teeth lol.



This is a great point to consider! They definitely require training and patience as they are very smart and stubborn! They are a great visual deterrent but it does take maturity before they are ready to assert themselves. For that reason, I would suggest a female because they seem to be more serious and mature much faster than males.

Same! I definitely expected him to at least bark to scare the man away. But he didn’t do a thing. I would of never noticed had I not turned around to the other side of my bed it was such a scary traumatic experience for sure.

As far as training is it just training and persistence? I feel like this is generally with all dogs as I’ve had a variety of breeds and I’ve been able to train them all myself without classes. Or are Dobermans more difficult to train than other dogs such as a boxer, chihuahua, or yorkie I’m sure it just depends on the dogs personality too? Now I’m getting a little worried about the training

Thank you so much for your input. Im
Definitely excited to add to our family again.

 

[Gpcoguy]

They're very intelligent which makes training easy as far as they learn commandd fairly quickly but it needs to be constant and consistant. I find it both enjoyable and very rewarding to see them progress but if you dont have both the time and desire to stick with it you could be on a path to disaster. As mentiond by others theyre strong headed and always happy to be the leader of the pack

 

[Ddski5]

I must say that I wish you great success with your first Doberman, if it is done correctly you will not be disappointed at all. You will be sooo proud of your accomplishment of having a well trained specimen and people will walk by in absolute awe…..

I am so glad you took my question the right way!! So many others usually take offense to that question. But it’s legit, because 4-6 months later they come on here with major behavioral issues because they were expecting the Doberman to be a turn off Lassie the lap dog. If one gets a Doberman that turns off on their own….then it is not the norm.

I’ve had many breeds and must say the Doberman is the most personal, smartest, loyal, velcro, noble, alert, confident and trustworthy breed Ive owned- just a phenomenal companion that wants to be with YOU all the time. But with those great qualities comes a cost- an equalizer. They MUST be trained….and I mean attention and trained on a daily basis to drain their physical and mental desires/needs. I would say that I had to have eyes on mine every waking second until they were at least 15 months old. Then mine started to slow down, mature and the last 12months of every day training seemed to show itself.

You have 4 children….I have 3 daughters. I can tell you that raising and training a Doberman can be as frustrating and difficult as raising children…just always have to be hands on and watching them continuously because of their energy drive. They just won’t go lay on the carpet for 1-2hrs and allow you to rest or take a nap.

I would be concerned that the Doberman would be too much for your household, your younger children and your small chihuahua. We have three cats also, and I had to stay on and train train train mine not to Dober-stomp my cats. It took prong and ECollar training to stop this.

I must go and do some training with my youngest daughter, I will come back and finish this on more of a positive note.

 

[Kaiser2016]

Same! I definitely expected him to at least bark to scare the man away. But he didn’t do a thing. I would of never noticed had I not turned around to the other side of my bed it was such a scary traumatic experience for sure.

So sorry to hear this, that would be frightening for sure. A Doberman will definitely make you feel safer and the way they bark/alert to things...it's amazing and awe inspiring. People even cross the street when they see us coming lol!

Re training, they will require more than just 'basic' training and being a first time owner is also challenging, but it's handy that you've got experience with other dogs too. Formal training will help train them to focus on you while ignoring all the distractions of the outside world and a class setting helps with this. They also require strong assertive leadership as they progress from puppyhood into the teenage terror stage before they become a more stable adult.

I do agree with @Ddski5 that with 4 kids, finding time and energy to train a Doberman is something to carefully consider. Plenty of people in similar situations have done it though, so don't be deterred until you've researched more! It could be the experience of a lifetime to have a Doberman by your side! Part of that research should include finding a reputable breeder which will help ensure a stable reliable temperament.

Also good to know in advance is that they are not a dog park kind of dog, they play rough and are often blamed when fights break out because of breed misconceptions.

 

[Kswoodssue]

Our female is over 9 months old. We love her like crazy, but she is a handful and she can be very rough in her play. I advise reading every bit of information here. It is very good. Welcome and good luck!

 

[Ddski5]

To finish:

I really don’t want to be all negative and deter you from the Doberman…It absolutely can be done, but you will need to set it in your mind that you need to set aside time to train and expend energy. You will need to educate and get your children involved to teach them how to handle and manage the DoberShark and DoberTeen. It is work- it is a lot of work but it can absolutely be done. Just like children, what you put in you will get out. Don’t do anything- then you can expect a crackhead Doberman- haha.

@Kaiser2016 is right when saying just the look, the appearance of a Doberman will make people question and use caution. And also the observed discipline displayed by a well trained Doberman. For ex. I walk to the end of my driveway to get the mail with Freyja on my left and Ragnar on my right. I will place both in a sit/stay 3/4 of the way day while I go to the mailbox. I will purposely malinger around there to not only train the two to sit/stay but also let the folks around know that I have disciplined Dobermans. To be honest, they are the talk of the neighborhood and are feared. I really don’t think either of them would hurt a fly- they just look and act the role.

You are in Texas? There are a lot of really good breeders out that way. You could get in contact and see what a breeder thinks, they may be able to work with you in finding one with a laid back temperament. I got my Ragnar out of Richmond (west of Houston)- he is actually a rehome from a family with 2yr old triplets….he was a 4 month old monster when I got him.

Good Luck and I really wish you the best!!
Ask more questions….read this site front and back…

One of my favorite sayings is:
A Doberman is not a dog, it’s a Doberman.

 

[Ddski5]

I fear that I have run this poster off and I did not even mention the two abdominal obstruction surgeries (2k) from eating little girls socks, scrunchies and panties.

Can someone please post great, happy, heart warming incidences with having a Doberman with your family….my girls love our Dobermans and are very proud to have them.

 

[Rits]

that would make a good service dog to help ease my PTSD and anxiety.

Are you wanting to make your dobe an actual service dog trained to perform tasks for PTSD? Wanting a dobe to be a service dog and be protective is not a good combination, imo. If something happened to you where you were unable to respond, emergency responders need to be able to help you.

Dobermans are incredibly intelligent. They are considered one of the smartest breeds. They do learn very quickly but tend to not like to repeat commands. They can burn out easily. They are smart enough to learn if something is "dumb" to them and move on, so in a way of their own, they are so smart they can be stubborn at times. You have to convince them it is fun to work for you! So adding in lots of play to your training is so very helpful. Training one is almost like a part time job the first few years. You really need to put a lot of work into one, training every day, including training in public settings a few times a week, especially if you want a service dog. Around 2-2.5 my girl's training has paid off and she's an absolute dream to own.

I currently only have a female but she adores children. I think males can sometimes be so goofy and not realize their size they may knock over children.

 

[Dasz88]

Are you wanting to make your dobe an actual service dog trained to perform tasks for PTSD? Wanting a dobe to be a service dog and be protective is not a good combination, imo. If something happened to you where you were unable to respond, emergency responders need to be able to help you.

Dobermans are incredibly intelligent. They are considered one of the smartest breeds. They do learn very quickly but tend to not like to repeat commands. They can burn out easily. They are smart enough to learn if something is "dumb" to them and move on, so in a way of their own, they are so smart they can be stubborn at times. You have to convince them it is fun to work for you! So adding in lots of play to your training is so very helpful. Training one is almost like a part time job the first few years. You really need to put a lot of work into one, training every day, including training in public settings a few times a week, especially if you want a service dog. Around 2-2.5 my girl's training has paid off and she's an absolute dream to own.

I currently only have a female but she adores children. I think males can sometimes be so goofy and not realize their size they may knock over children.

Can confirm, Gilly is an almost 1 year old boy with zero spatial awareness; dog-on-child collisions are frequent events here. I like a male for my working dog partner in SAR, BECAUSE I specifically need a high drive nutjob that will work himself to death or jump off a cliff if I ask him to. It works for his "job" lol. But, I think the females have better critical thinking skills, can moderate their drive levels a little better (not that they have less drive, just more self control?) and will play calmer with a bunch of kids. I think they can be a little more stubborn though, if you ask them to do something they don't see the point in doing. Just my two cents!