Can anyone help ease my mind?

Hello everyone! This is my first thread, and already with the drama.. LOL. Seriously though, I want to show you all a video and tell you what happened afterward to see what you think.

We got this boy yesterday morning. So far he has been amazing, awesome, etc, etc, etc. I have not one complaint about him so far.. a little background, he is eight months old, seems to be even-tempered, great with other animals, etc. A well-mannered boy. This is his first time in a "family/kids" situation (he was shown by the breeder before), and he is not (yet) neutered.

And remember, we have only had him for two days, so I KNOW that everyone is still settling in, and that there is a lot of "feeling out" to be done on both sides. And as an aside, this dog is on a trial period so I want to make a very informed decision. And also, as I mentioned in my intro thread, this is our first personal Doberman.. we have been around a pair of them quite a bit but really have more living-quarters experience with Rotties.

We had not heard so much as a peep out of this dog until tonight. Although, he had been pestering our small dog- and even the cat- all evening, trying to get them to play with him. He was in a very obvious play mode with them, but had no interest in me and my silly ropes and squeaky toys.. lol. He wanted the furry ones to play and just couldn't convince them. But still, he never barked. So this came next:


Now, before anyone jumps the gun, know that this ^^ isn't really what I'm questioning. From the way he circled and checked the situation first, I assumed he was just trying to calm them down and was being a bit unsure and a little protective. Fine. My camera died at the end.. but what he did is walk up and smell them both, then backed up one step and barked some more, not directed at either of them in particular.

However, this startled my son a little so I took the dog out on the porch with me and we sat for a minute. He kept looking in the sliding glass door at my son and every time my son would make a move, he would hyper-alert and let out just one loud bark. No growling, no anxious whining or anything. I calmly brought the dog back into the house and put him in his kennel and told him "relax."

After about five minutes in there, I walked back into the living room where my son was sitting on the coffee table flossing his teeth and watching TV. I took the dog out of the kennel and leashed him. I sat down in the recliner and just relaxed and gave the dog just enough line to reach my son. (My son had no idea the dog was even behind him.. he wasn't looking at the dog.)

This is what I'm questioning:

The dog sniffed him, took a step back and barked one big time. But this was not the playful posture that he had earlier with the other animals. But it also wasn't a particularly aggressive stance. It was just an...assertive stance, I would say. (I wish I'd gotten that part on video).

I really don't have much else to say, lol. I'm tired and need to sleep on this to sort it all out, but I just don't know how exactly to interpret it. My child is involved, so naturally my emotions as a mother are also involved. I'm also pressuring myself to not miss any possible hints of an issue during our trial period, so I think I'm psyching myself out. (I think this is my biggest issue) I want to make the right decision, whatever that may be.

This dog is just SO darn good so far. I really am bummed that I have a "questionable" mommy-feeling about him now. Right now he is sacked out in his kennel and back to his normal self when I go to peek at him.

If you read all of this, you get a cookie. If you can ease my mind, I'll bake you a dozen. I really hope I feel better about this in the morning, in which case I'll likely be embarrassed for posting this drawn-out thread on here tonight. But oh well, such is life!

Well this means one of two things to me, Either he didn't like the horseplay (some Dobermans don't) or he thought it was interesting and wanted to play as well. I keep watching it over and over, I think when your son squeals thats when he is like "What is going on?" Now when I've heard my Dobes bark like that, it was at unfamiliar sounds. So in my opinion your dog barked at the "strange" sound. I don't think you have anything to be worried about, I think hes just going to have to get used to new things. BTW Hes gorgeous!

Edit:
That is a honest to god true doberman bark when they here unusal sounds. You'll see that he may do that outside in the yard walking around or when people knock. It doesn't mean hes going to harm anyone. Thats his "alert" bark as in "Oh my gawd mom, did you hear that?!"

I agree with MaddoxDobes, oh by the way when your dobe barked my Baby girl(also a doberman) came running into the room barking just like ur dog did that's why i agree with maddoxdobes.
just give him some time he is just getting used to new smells sounds pets and people he will warm up and well he is beautiful where did you get him? hold on i have a video you might want to see let me look for it.

I feel bad that your so worried, It may take time for your new addition to get used to how things work, but all in all, you want him to be alert. He has already accepted you and your home as a place to keep safe! He meant no harm to your son or anyone, but he thought he'd let you know that he heard something he was unfamiliar with. I hope you can feel better about the incident now

found it here is the ling just click on it ok its a very good touching video.
Holy Crap this will make you cry!! - Doberman Chat Forum
if you look at the comments you will several of mine explaning how my dog gave his life to save mine.

My girl sounds exactly like that...when she is being protective and she looks to me as to what her actions are next. Like you said, it wasnt a aggressive exactly, In my opinion he is trying to figure out if that is horseplay or if there is some aggression from the "big man" directed toward your boy, and since " dad " was putting the beat down on the boy as it were LMAO, the dog was thinking "barking" at him and judging your reaction would probably tell him what the appropriate behaviour would be. Kinda like he was telling your boy to "mind your manners " I wouldnt worry too much...once he realizes that it is all a fun game...those 3 will do some serious rough housing. When Lexi gets a little "iffy" in her barking, I tell her to stop it and then in a slightly higher pitched voice or baby voice...." were just having fun" or something like that...and quick as that...she realizes...hey ! they are just messing around ! and she tucks her butt under and does the "zoomies" running circles around us.

And to add on top of all the rough play, the strange noises that kids make , squealing giggling are all new and that just seemed to add to his wondering. If it were me, once he found a toy that he enjoyed playing with, I would play a game of keep away with him, laughing, giggling, squealing, etc etc and he should get the clue real quick that all that noise leads to a hell of a lot of fun.

Welcome aboard...hope you have fun with your new boy...it will take some adjusting too. Getting to know each other..and you will learn all the little different barks they make, just subtle tone changes mean so many different things. And the same for him, he is going to have to learn your different tones in your voice...he will get it. Sounds like hes got a good even attitude.

Since I also got Buddy at 7 months old, I'm curious as to his background? Was he a rescue or bought from a breeder? He looks much more adjusted than Buddy did when we brought him home! Buddy probably would have hid in a corner with all that rough housing! He came from a home with several other dogs and one woman to our home where there are no other animals and a woman and a MAN! Yikes...lol He was NEVER fearful to nip or bite though. I was watching for that! Hubby had to carry him out of the car because he wouldn't go and I knew that in their fear, they could nip, but nope. Your dog seems so much more alert, eager and wants to play. I'd take that as a good sign. I have to agree that I also think he never heard sounds like the 'scream' from your son and it may have made him nervous that your son was getting hurt OR he's been in that situation before and knew it was 'play' and wanted in! That's where the background on him comes in...as to where he came from. What kind of situation.

For me, since you really don't know this dog very well yet, I would make sure he understands the difference with horsing around. His prey drive might be high and his 'play' could be too rough, especially with a small child. My first Dobe had high prey drive and watching this video reminds me of him. Watching, alert, and wanting to get in on the action. All that's ok, but, again, his kind of play could get kind of rough for a child. I'd just make sure he understands 'no bite' and to back away when told. His protection mode might be kicking in for your boy too...which is a good instinct, but only if he understands that YOU are not the bad guy! Make sure he knows you are the Pack Leader. How old is your son? I would never leave him alone with the dog either...just a precaution that everyone should do with a small child.

Wow.. you guys are great! LOL I was worried I would get up and have no replies and people would think I'm a worry-wart.

So we did all read that he continued to seem unsure of my son even AFTER this happened, right? I want to make sure nobody misses that. He made me pretty uncomfy with the way he acted afterward, and my hubby wasn't even in the room then. He was just WAY too "up-on" and interested in my son for my comfort, seeing as I didn't know how to interpret the true meaning of the behavior in the video.

He's not out of his kennel yet this morning, (we just woke up)- but my son has walked past it several times just moving the cat around, etc, and I've been watching the dog.. he's seeming perfectly normal so far. So here we go- I'm going to take him out and then let him back in. We'll go easy on the horseplay this morning.

I will share more about the dog's background when I get back. And of course, we'll still have to take into account whether or not this "really" scared my son last night or if he thinks he'll be alright with the "big dog.." LOL.

I have to agree with everyone here. I watch the video 5-6 times and saw a couple things. Here is what I notice and my opinion.
1) either he is unsure of the horse play or wants to be part(already said) something I would have your husband do is see if the pup will engage in playing (not to rough)
2) is there a window/door on the opposite side of were they were wrestling, when he barked and moved back you turned the camera to follow him and he was looking at something over there(he may have herd a noise)
3) he was running around the couch like he wanted to be part of the game
4) he does bark after that high pitch laugh/ shrill which my dogs have done (O.E.Bullies) with my 4 and 1.5 yr old girls running around the house.

I really don't think you have anything to worry about. You have an 8 moth old pup that is in new surroundings and may never had know a child. make sure your son shares in the duties of feeding and treats.

MaddoxDobes said:

I feel bad that your so worried, It may take time for your new addition to get used to how things work, but all in all, you want him to be alert. He has already accepted you and your home as a place to keep safe! He meant no harm to your son or anyone, but he thought he'd let you know that he heard something he was unfamiliar with. I hope you can feel better about the incident now

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I agree. I think the dog was reacting to an unfamilar sound.

Here is some information on dog body language:
Body Language in Dogs: how to read what your dog is saying, from Stacy's Wag'N'Train

http://www.pawsacrossamerica.com/interpret.html

Dog Body Language - Reading Your Dog's Body Language

Well, he's out. I just don't know, guys. He was fine at first; pretty much ignored my son, which is fine by me. After letting him out, we were all in the play room. He saw a man walking his dog out the window and barked. Then he walked over to my son (who was sitting in a chair), sniffed him, and then growled.

I would have thought he was growling at the man/dog outside, but he didn't look back out the window again after he growled; he walked over and put his head on my husband's lap (son was sitting next to husband.)

I'm seriously wondering if he's being protective of my husband?? Are we all crazy? To top it off, my son is TOTALLY downtrodden (sp?) over the whole thing.. when the dog barked I said quietly, now what was that for? DS said, "It's me.." and looked so very sad.

It doesn't help that my son is not at all assertive (he's seven). Will this be an issue do we think?

ok so I only watched the video once and I too don't think you have anything to be worried about, I would ALWAYS watch playtime with dog and child, in my household you cannot rough house iwth the kids, my red boy Phoenix does NOT like it and will get in the middle and make you back off, the kids and adults that come to my house know this rule, I would just make the horseplay around the Dobe not so rough between father and son or put the Dobe in a different room, but that coulddrive him nuts. But like I said he seems like he watns to play, I just wouldn't have horseplay in the house around the dog. JMO. But good looking dog , son and the little dog,

You, your husband and your son ALL need to be alpha to the dog, period, ALPHA. He doesn't see your son as an alpha figure, and why would he protect your hubby from your son, oh wait he was protecting from the dog outside, a natural instinct for a Dobe but the growling at your son is NOT ok, for any reason, unless it is during play and I don't even allow that. Let your son give him treats, make the dog work for his treat from your son and help your son be more assertive with the dog. As long as the dog sees that the human is weak they will take advantage and that is with ANY breed, please let the boy feed him and walk him ALWAYS with your supervision.


Let me think some more I am off to work, lol. Good luck just always keep an eye on the dog and son til things have settled down at your home.

MomToMany said:

Well, he's out. I just don't know, guys. He was fine at first; pretty much ignored my son, which is fine by me. After letting him out, we were all in the play room. He saw a man walking his dog out the window and barked. Then he walked over to my son (who was sitting in a chair), sniffed him, and then growled.

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ooooo....I dunno guys, but this scares me a tad. Any growling to me is not a good sign. But I also would have corrected him for it. Whether he is protecting your husband or whatever, I couldn't allow that, especially against a child. I have grandchildren and my MAIN objective when I was getting a new Doberman, was them! I find it difficult to pass on advice that I fear would be wrong...I hate like hell to say anything against this dog, because we are not getting the full advantage of living with him. But I have to say, growling, in my opinion, is something that stops me dead in my tracks. Anybody else? I'd like to hear what everybody else thinks here too, please.

MomToMany said:

Well, he's out. I just don't know, guys. He was fine at first; pretty much ignored my son, which is fine by me. After letting him out, we were all in the play room. He saw a man walking his dog out the window and barked. Then he walked over to my son (who was sitting in a chair), sniffed him, and then growled.

I would have thought he was growling at the man/dog outside, but he didn't look back out the window again after he growled; he walked over and put his head on my husband's lap (son was sitting next to husband.)

I'm seriously wondering if he's being protective of my husband?? Are we all crazy? To top it off, my son is TOTALLY downtrodden (sp?) over the whole thing.. when the dog barked I said quietly, now what was that for? DS said, "It's me.." and looked so very sad.

It doesn't help that my son is not at all assertive (he's seven). Will this be an issue do we think?

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This isn't going to be a very popular statement, but I'd return the dog ASAP since he is on a trial period. It sounds like your whole family is upset over this dog and like you don't trust him. I know what it is like to own a dog that can't be trusted, but I do not have any kids.

You know what is best for your situation. Follow your own instincts.:bighug:

I was writing as My Buddy was posting. It was the growling at the son that got me too.

Thank you for your opinion, Ingrid. I feel really bad about this whole situation, Momtomany, I hate like hell to not give a dog the benefit of the doubt, but as Ingrid and I feel...the growl just is not a good sign, especially directed at your child. That scares the bejebbers out of me. I'm not sure what you should do. And I feel bad for your boy, feeling like the dog doesn't like him...how sad! I'd wait and see what they others on the Forum have to add, but please watch him around your son....

Thanks, Ingrid and MyBuddy.. You have definitely validated my own decision, as well as the fact that we are halfway back to returning the dog as I type (hubby driving of course lol). I will be back later with more. nothing happened since the growl though, but that was it for me regardless of what posters said. Be back soon!

Man, this just tears me up...I don't even know the dog but I feel terrible about this whole ordeal....Your child comes first of course, but I sure want this dog to have a chance. I can't help but cry for this dog to have a second chance with someone, possibly with no children so they can help him NOW for the possibility of children later. I pray that will come true! Keep in touch Momtomany.

OK. I'm sure you've made the best decision you could for the interest of your family and the dog. It's still gotta be hard, but in the end everyone will be happier and have a better life.
:goodvibes:

so not to be ugly but did anyone read what I wrote???


Yes I also meant to say that since the pup is on a trail run I would give him back, but IT is something that can be corrected if done properly. Like I said he doesn't know that you are ALL alpha over him. Protection or not, JMO Let us know how things turn out.

apbtmom76 said:

ok so I only watched the video once and I too don't think you have anything to be worried about, I would ALWAYS watch playtime with dog and child, in my household you cannot rough house iwth the kids, my red boy Phoenix does NOT like it and will get in the middle and make you back off, the kids and adults that come to my house know this rule, I would just make the horseplay around the Dobe not so rough between father and son or put the Dobe in a different room, but that coulddrive him nuts. But like I said he seems like he watns to play, I just wouldn't have horseplay in the house around the dog. JMO. But good looking dog , son and the little dog,

You, your husband and your son ALL need to be alpha to the dog, period, ALPHA. He doesn't see your son as an alpha figure, and why would he protect your hubby from your son, oh wait he was protecting from the dog outside, a natural instinct for a Dobe but the growling at your son is NOT ok, for any reason, unless it is during play and I don't even allow that. Let your son give him treats, make the dog work for his treat from your son and help your son be more assertive with the dog. As long as the dog sees that the human is weak they will take advantage and that is with ANY breed, please let the boy feed him and walk him ALWAYS with your supervision.


Let me think some more I am off to work, lol. Good luck just always keep an eye on the dog and son til things have settled down at your home.

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I did read it...I guess I was a bit more focused on the growling alone. I feel everything you said was fine, and correct...I just had a bad feeling about the growling and couldn't see having her child work with the dog (treats, walking etc.) It just seemed dangerous. I haven't a lot of experience with aggression and that's why I was hoping to get more input from others. I just know for myself, a growl directed at my child, stops me dead in my tracks. I couldn't get the words out, Take him back, because I feel so much for the dog! But in the interest of her child, which of course, should come first, it's probably the best thing. I'm still torn though! Only because I want the dog placed but, gawd, I couldn't take that chance with my child. sorry.